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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26104906">to begin again</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/civillove/pseuds/civillove'>civillove</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>seblaine prompts from tumblr [96]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Glee</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 06:07:02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,876</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26104906</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/civillove/pseuds/civillove</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>anon requested, ‘Blaine cancels his first date with Sebastian, who thinks it’s about Kurt. Turns out, he’s just sick. Oops.’<br/>--<br/>When Sebastian asks Blaine to give him a chance, he doesn’t expect this.</p><p>He understands right away that he has a lot of trust to earn back, that Blaine doesn’t owe him anything regardless of how much he might try to turn over a new leaf—no matter how much Sebastian might prove to him that he’s being better. A nasty part of him knows this is exactly who Blaine is, that Sebastian’s taking advantage of someone kind and warm and who forgives too easily.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Blaine Anderson/Sebastian Smythe</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>seblaine prompts from tumblr [96]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/82780</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>114</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>to begin again</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>really enjoyed this prompt. thanks so much anon! this is canon divergence at its finest *u* alternate season 4, you'll see what i mean</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Sebastian asks Blaine to give him a chance, he doesn’t expect this.</p><p>He understands right away that he has a lot of trust to earn back, that Blaine doesn’t owe him anything regardless of how much he might try to turn over a new leaf—no matter how much Sebastian might prove to him that he’s being <em>better. </em>A nasty part of him knows this is exactly who Blaine is, that Sebastian’s taking advantage of someone kind and warm and who forgives too easily.</p><p>Blaine gives out second chances to people who don’t deserve them and Sebastian grabs onto that and holds it so tight between his fingers that it might shatter like glass.</p><p>But after time passes and they don’t automatically pick up where they left off, Sebastian understands that Blaine might have forgiven him for the whole slushie thing but that doesn’t mean they’re friends. It doesn’t mean they text or call one another or grab coffee at the Lima Bean or at the Dalton Café. It somehow means everything and nothing all at the same time.</p><p>He knows that there’s no double meaning in Blaine Anderson’s words when it comes to forgiveness—it’s simply the way it is. Blaine accepts his apology and Sebastian realizes that’s the easy part.</p><p>The stuff that comes after? That’s what he has to work for.</p><p>--</p><p>He falls back into a regular routine for a long time, just less blackmail and being a generally nasty person. He reaches his limits of patience during Warbler practices all the time but smiles tight-lipped at Trent when he doesn’t get the routine down for the tenth run-through instead of yelling at him, so, he considers that progress.</p><p>Classes, the Warblers and lacrosse keep him busy, which is good because Sebastian enjoys being distracted. Full plates leave less time to himself, less time to think, to consider the direction his life is moving in.</p><p>Sometimes right before he falls asleep he thinks about Blaine. He always tries to turn it into something obscene, chemical, physical—the way his ass perfectly filled out his pants or the soft, gentle swell of his biceps poking out of his too-tight polo shirts. His curls are trapped under way too much gel, eyes like a liquid honey in natural lighting and his face squishes a little when he’s happy, when he’s talking about something that excites him. Sebastian thinks <em>a lot </em>about Blaine’s mouth and the curve of his lips and what he’d like to do if given the time.</p><p>But it all whittles down to how he misses talking on the phone with him, how Blaine sounds when he almost falls asleep as they talk about absolutely nothing and text messages about Halloween decorations way before the holiday that used to ping his phone at the most random times.</p><p>Sebastian hasn’t gone as far to delete old message or phone logs, some of them unbalanced in range from two hours long to five minutes. And yet, it’s somehow the shorter conversations that feel like a lifetime.</p><p>--</p><p>Sebastian overhears about them breaking up but he’s never told anything directly.</p><p>It’s mostly through social media, a little bit of snooping, and listening in on Nick talk to Jeff in Warblers practice about something he heard through someone else. It’s all a game of telephone; passed down information that’s probably more wrong than anything else. There’s a point though, he knows that the very heart of the conversation is true and Sebastian’s always been good at digging through information until he finds what he’s looking for.</p><p>Kurt went to New York, promised long distance and true love, and dropped Blaine like an out-of-style handbag.</p><p>He wishes he could say he’s the least bit surprised.</p><p>Sebastian plays back a moment over and over again in his head, seeing Kurt in the Lima Bean and telling him that Blaine was too good for him. Regardless that Blaine seems to be too good for <em>anyone </em>doesn’t make the statement any less true. He wonders if Kurt will realize at some point what he’s lost and regret it.</p><p>He knows all about what it’s like to lose a guy like Blaine Anderson and this is coming from someone who’s never really had him in the first place.</p><p>--</p><p>A month later, his phone pings with a text from a number he could never bring himself to delete.</p><p><strong>Blaine Anderson (7:00PM): </strong>Very important question—do you think an okapi looks like a zebra?</p><p>Sebastian blinks at the text message and thinks it’s spam the one moment, that Blaine’s accidently texted the wrong number the second and or that it’s an accident the next. He and Blaine used to text about random stuff all the time, mostly just stream of consciousness, funny pictures or talking just because it passed the time. This is what it used to feel like but he’s afraid of slipping back into that mindset because what if he fucks up and it’s taken from him all over again?</p><p>He types out a message and deletes it three times before sending back:</p><p><strong>Sebastian Smythe (7:10PM):</strong> It’s known as a forest giraffe.</p><p><strong>Blaine Anderson (7:10PM):</strong> That’s not what I asked you lol</p><p>Sebastian smiles softly and hovers over the cursor for a few moments as it blinks at him, waiting for him to move his thumbs. He wants to ask why the sudden interest in okapi (or also known as, <em>why are you texting me again?).</em> The fact that Blaine isn’t dating Kurt anymore might be it—now either he’s allowed to because he’s single or Blaine no longer feels a certain <em>pressure </em>about their so-called-friendship. There’s no one to explain it to…they can simply just be themselves.</p><p>Whatever that means.</p><p><strong>Sebastian Smythe (7:12PM):</strong> Are you asking me or trying to convince me about this?</p><p><strong>Blaine Anderson (7:13PM):</strong> :)? It’s got striped legs.</p><p><strong>Sebastian Smythe (7:13PM):</strong> They are literally related to the giraffe.</p><p><strong>Blaine Anderson (7:15PM):</strong> Yeah but they look like a zebra. They seem like they’re one thing but actually something completely different altogether.</p><p>He pauses at the phrasing, chewing on his lower lip as he shifts in bed and lies on his back. He googles pictures of okapi for a few moments before sending Blaine a picture of a baby one with the message,</p><p><strong>Sebastian Smythe (7:18PM):</strong> Regardless if they’re related to the giraffe or zebra or whatever, they’re still getting eaten by lions. They’re endangered.</p><p><strong>Blaine Anderson (7:19PM):</strong> I can’t believe /that’s/ what you’re telling me ):</p><p>He snorts and runs a hand through his hair,</p><p><strong>Sebastian Smythe (7:21PM):</strong> Is this really about okapi?</p><p>There’s no reply back which just tells him that no, this is really not about okapi. Sebastian almost falls asleep in bed watching a French film on his laptop when his phone rings. He knows who it is before he even picks it up and Blaine sighs a little dramatically into the receiver,</p><p>“I really am concerned about these okapi though, now that you told me they’re endangered.”</p><p>Sebastian laughs softly and shakes his head, closing his laptop and setting it aside. “There are a ton of animal sanctuaries out there, try not to think so hard about it.”</p><p>Blaine’s quiet for a few moments and sometimes he knows he needs this, just to sit on the other end of the line with someone and listen to the white noise. The breathing between them is a solid wall of comfort.</p><p>“You really knew this wasn’t about okapi?” Blaine asks and it sounds like the shifting of sheets—maybe he’s in bed too.</p><p>“Uh, I know you like to rant about random animals sometimes but this felt rather serious,” He smirks, tugging his sheets up against his chest. “You’re not hard to figure out.”</p><p>Blaine hums softly at that but doesn’t say anything—Sebastian wonders if he doesn’t believe him or that no one in his life ever really <em>tries </em>to see him or peel back his layers. The taller bites down hard on the tip of his tongue because <em>that </em>feels utterly ridiculous to him.</p><p>“I’m having trouble figuring out where I fit,” Blaine admits after a few moments. “I transferred schools to be with Kurt and now he’s gone and I feel…<em>lost.” </em></p><p>Sebastian looks down at his hand on his comforter, tracing a circle into the fabric over and over again. The okapi looking like a zebra but actually being related to the giraffe somehow feels like it makes a lot more sense now.</p><p>“I mean, I’m not really that upset about breaking up because it wasn’t working. We tried hard to make it work but you can’t force something when both people don’t want the same thing.”</p><p>Sebastian hums because he has a feeling he <em>knows </em>who didn’t want what and it—seems so impossible not to want Blaine in any circumstance, which just proves his point all that time ago when he told Kurt that he didn’t deserve Blaine.</p><p>“I love my friends and I love glee club but I don’t feel like I belong, like I’m always on the outside looking in.” <em>No one listens to me, no one hears me, no one sees me—</em>is what he’s really saying, Sebastian’s chest aching just slightly as he recognizes the longing in Blaine’s words.</p><p>“You can always come back to Dalton,” Sebastian says finally, “There’s always a place for you here and if they’re really your friends, they’ll support you in that.”</p><p>Blaine lets out a short breath, like he’s been waiting for someone to tell him that. Like he’s been waiting to feel <em>okay </em>about a choice he wants to make, “And the Warblers? You think they’d…be okay if I came back?”</p><p>Sebastian makes a noise that sounds like <em>are you kidding? </em>“Hunter is a fucking nightmare—they’ve been talking about you since you’ve left.”</p><p>He can’t see the blush but he knows it’s there, on Blaine’s cheeks and the back of his neck when he says, “Oh hush.”</p><p>Sebastian smirks and turns to lie on his stomach, hand resting in his hair. “I forgot I’m speaking to one of the most modest legends Dalton’s ever known. What are you doing up at this time of night anyways? Planning Show Choir domination and detailing it out on your blog?”</p><p>“I already did that,” Blaine tuts, throwing his teasing right back at him. “Now I’m researching okapis that you can foster through animal conservatories. Want to do it with me?”</p><p>Sebastian’s rolling his eyes but he’s already saying ‘sure’, like he could ever say no to anything Blaine asks of him.</p><p>--</p><p>Sebastian’s already late for lacrosse practice but he’s been waiting in line for this espresso for ten minutes. Apparently there’s a new barista who keeps breaking the machine but he’s practicing patience and being an all-around nicer person so he digs his heels in the ground. And smiles when the barista looks up, flustered, and apologizes to each new person in line.</p><p>He lets out a sigh and glares at the ceiling before debating the pros and cons of going to practice without a caffeine fix.</p><p>“Excuse me,” Someone asks from behind him and Sebastian turns—</p><p>Blaine Anderson in the flesh wearing a Dalton blazer and for some reason it’s like seeing him for the first time all over again. He’s never really encountered him in his uniform before and it’s ridiculous how well it fits him, like it was <em>made </em>for him and him alone. His hair is slightly looser than before too, all that gel a cry for help when he was with Kurt, curls gentle and soft along his forehead and ears.</p><p>“I’m new here. Think I could get a tour?” Blaine sticks his hands in his pockets, pleased with himself for a great entrance.</p><p>Sebastian smirks softly and adjusts his bag on his shoulder, “That depends. Are you a freshman?”</p><p>Blaine grins, “Do I <em>look </em>like a freshman?”</p><p>He skips the espresso and lacrosse practice but his coach will totally understand it’s important to prioritize being pleasant and welcoming to new students</p><p>Turning over a new leaf, remember?</p><p>--</p><p>Sebastian doesn’t have to ask how the first Warbler practice goes for Blaine because the hum of thrilled excitement embraces him with open arms. So many people are happy to see him, even Hunter looks slightly pleased (because this means they have a real chance at winning now) and the mood shifts organically as Blaine gives feedback and suggestions to the group.</p><p>And they listen.</p><p>He sneaks looks at Blaine throughout practice and it’s almost hard to look away, like staring at the sun—he can see the exact moment where things click into place. That Blaine feels wanted and accepted, appreciated in a way he clearly was not over at McKinley.</p><p>Sebastian buys him a medium drip afterwards, Blaine adding a bit too much cream for his taste and plays with two packets of sugar between his fingertips as they sit at a familiar table in the café.</p><p>“Hunter wants to give you a solo for Sectionals and before you give me some line about how you don’t deserve it, you <em>do.” </em></p><p>Blaine smiles softly as he sips his coffee, “I just got back. Is he sure there isn’t someone else who should take one before me?”</p><p>Sebastian scoffs and leans back against his seat, “While Hunter may be insufferable, he’s incredibly good at reading a room. He knows what you mean to the Warblers just from one practice—he’ll keep you happy because he doesn’t want you to quit. Or worse, replace him.”</p><p>The shorter laughs softly and shakes his head, leaning forward to put his elbows on the table. “That’s too bad, that was my next step.”</p><p>Sebastian grins, eyes traveling pleasantly over Blaine’s frame. “Think I’ve become a bad influence; you’re starting to sound like me.”</p><p>He flicks a sugar packet in Sebastian’s direction and drums his fingers onto the wooden table. “Tell Hunter I’ll do the song but only on one condition.”</p><p>The taller raises an eyebrow, intrigued. “Is that condition a blowjob?”</p><p>“That it’s a <em>duet.” </em>Blaine laughs and nudges Sebastian’s shin under the table. “With you.”</p><p>He smirks against the rim of his cup, “Well that’s definitely something I can get behind.”</p><p>“Or in front of.” Blaine mentions casually, like he’s talking about the weather, but there’s something tinted with heat between his syllables.</p><p>Is he <em>flirting </em>with him? Or is this just how Blaine is with people he’s friends with again; loose and carefree, comfortable.</p><p>Sebastian tells himself he isn’t going to overthink it and decides to focus on the pressure of their legs still pressed together under the table.</p><p>--</p><p>Sometimes Blaine does this thing where he hides a question he wants to ask or a point he wants to make within a text message thread. It’s probably because he’s so used to being brushed off or denied the opportunity to speak his mind that he overcompensates without realizing it. Sebastian’s getting pretty good at sifting in-between his words.</p><p>Blaine texts him a picture of a pigeon with a message that says: ‘he looks like you’, a comment about Hunter’s dictatorship with how he runs Warbler meetings and sandwiched in the middle of that is:</p><p>I really like this one Cary Grant film that they’re playing at the old theater near Dalton.</p><p><strong>Sebastian Smythe (8:10PM):</strong> Are you asking me out?</p><p><strong>Blaine Anderson (8:11PM):</strong> No.</p><p><strong>Blaine Anderson (8:11PM):</strong> Maybe. Unless you have a secret boyfriend I don’t know about.</p><p>Sebastian smiles, shaking his head as he texts back purposely slow, just to torture him a little. He finds it ironic that he’s seen Blaine a total of nine different times today but he waited to text him about this movie instead of asking him in person. He distantly wonders how many times Blaine hinted at things he’s wanted with Kurt only to be pushed to the side.</p><p><strong>Sebastian Smythe (8:15PM):</strong> Yeah, sorry. He’s incredibly possessive—especially when it comes to cute curls, a great ass, and a voice like yours.</p><p><strong>Blaine Anderson (8:16PM):</strong> Doesn’t bother me if it doesn’t bother you.</p><p>Sebastian laughs outright at that, texting back: That delivery was so smooth.</p><p><strong>Blaine Anderson (8:16PM):</strong> Oh well, I learned from the best ;)</p><p>Sebastian leans against his desk as he fiddles with a pen between his fingers, tapping his English Lit homework with patient beats. He smiles a little, thinking about how to reply as he chews down on the inside of his cheek. The tables have definitely turned; is this some sort of coma he’s fallen into or a fever dream? Sebastian knows he’s lucky Blaine decided to rebuild their burnt bridge, how he never thought this moment would ever exist for him.</p><p>He feels like there has to be another shoe getting ready to drop, that Blaine’s going to send another text at any moment that tells him he’s just kidding. That he doesn’t really want to go on a date with him.</p><p>But that message doesn’t come.</p><p><strong>Sebastian Smythe (8:20PM):</strong> What time does the movie start?</p><p>--</p><p>They decide to meet at the theater because Blaine’s joined a few more clubs since coming back to Dalton and Sebastian has a late lacrosse practice. They haven’t really seen one another all day given their different schedules and other than a few pictures of fish texted back and forth (just because) it’s been radio silence.</p><p>He scrolls through a few texts as he waits outside the theater, drawing his jacket closer around himself. A soft smile tugs the corners of his mouth as he hovers over a photo that Blaine’s sent two hours ago: one of those puffer fish all blown up like a balloon with the simple message of ‘that’s you’.</p><p>Sebastian has no idea why he finds this ritual between them so endearing but it certainly doesn’t stop him from texting back a picture of seahorse with the reply ‘okay, then this is you’. Because Blaine most <em>definitely </em>has the softest swell of a tummy if you look close enough, the form-fitting clothes he wears just proving his point.</p><p>He lets out a long sigh and glances up and around, a few people who are not Blaine passing him by to enter the theater. Looking at the time, a soft scrunch appears between his eyebrows because Sebastian knows he was a little early but Blaine’s usually right on time. He shifts on his feet, rocking onto his heels and losing himself in analyzing old movie posters before digging out his phone again.</p><p>Now he’s late and not by just five minutes.</p><p>Frowning, he draws up a text message: Did the ‘tight pants club’ run late?</p><p>He sends that and waits. Nothing.</p><p><strong>Sebastian Smythe (9:30PM): </strong>Blaine?</p><p>Again, there’s no response.</p><p>Sebastian’s about to call him when he finally gets a text back, words that do nothing to settle the nerves beginning to pinprick under his skin.</p><p><strong>Blaine Anderson (9:40PM):</strong> I’m really sorry, I can’t tonight. I’ll explain tomorrow, promise.</p><p>Sebastian stares at the message for a few minutes, not sure how to reply. He types out ‘okay’ about four times before he decides not to send anything as he walks back to his car. Running a hand over his face, he notices his fingers are trembling a little. He cranks the heat up in the car even though he knows he’s not cold—there’s a sour pit in his stomach, threatening in waves to make him vomit.</p><p>He’s afraid he knows what this means all too well.</p><p>Blaine told him last week that he was talking to Kurt again. It wasn’t anything special, just a few messages back and forth about school and Blaine was hopeful they could be friends again. Despite Sebastian not liking Kurt in the slightest, he wants Blaine to be happy.</p><p>But what if it’s developed into something <em>more </em>and Sebastian’s just too much of an idiot to realize that he’s lost all over again? That Blaine’s changed his mind about this movie for a reason?</p><p>Sebastian doesn’t think he can handle being let down easy—if Blaine wants to cancel their date then he’s going to do so to his face <em>tonight. </em></p><p>--</p><p>He drives all the way back to Dalton to figure out that Blaine’s gone home, thanks to Nick letting him know when he stands outside Blaine’s dorm room and knocks like a moron for ten minutes. Is this all so he can avoid him, or what? Sebastian feels like his nerves are about to bust out of his muscles and crack his bones wide open, threatening to swallow him whole as he drives to Blaine’s house.</p><p>This feels a little ridiculous but they haven’t come so far with one another to just <em>not </em>talk about this. If Sebastian’s going to lose him all over again then Blaine needs to fucking tell him outright, not through a text. Because that’s exactly what will happen. Kurt’s always been threatened by him and despite the fact that Blaine wants friendship with the both of them? It won’t happen.</p><p>Sebastian’s worked hard to turn over a new leaf and all Kurt will do is drudge up the past and remind Blaine that he doesn’t deserve forgiveness.</p><p>He’s going to <em>lay </em>into him about Kurt if his ex’s name slips out of his mouth because what the fuck? How can Blaine just transfer schools and…put himself back together only to let Kurt barrel into his life and tear him apart again?</p><p>Jesus.</p><p>Sebastian knocks on Blaine’s front door a little harder than necessary, opening his mouth to snap, those old ways hugging around his frame like velvet and barbed wire—</p><p>Until he gets a good look at Blaine’s face.</p><p>He looks <em>terrible </em>and that’s coming from Sebastian; he didn’t think Blaine could ever look like this. He’s got dark purple smudges underneath his eyes, like a painter has placed them there with their thumbs. Wrapped in a thick sweater and a blanket around his shoulders, he looks smaller than usual, Blaine’s face pale despite the tip of his nose being bright red.</p><p>The shorter frowns at him, leaning against the doorframe with a thick sniffle and cough into his arm.</p><p>Oh.</p><p>
  <em>Oh. </em>
</p><p>“You’re <em>sick.” </em>Sebastian says, utter surprise wrapping around his words.</p><p>Blaine blinks at him, voice scratchy when he responds, “Yeah, I was too tired to text the ongoing struggle. I’ve been dozing on the couch since I got home.”</p><p>Sebastian wishes the ground would open up and swallow him whole as he runs a hand over his face, feeling completely <em>ridiculous. </em>It feels like a balloon is popped with a needle, a lot of his strong emotions deflating the longer he stands there looking at Blaine.</p><p>Blaine, who seems like he’s going to fall over on the spot. He pulls back suddenly and turns to sneeze, the sound making Sebastian wince. He’s about to hand him a tissue but Blaine’s already digging in the pockets of his joggers for one.</p><p>“I…I thought I could push through but I’ve been feeling gradually terrible since yesterday,” He admits, blowing his nose, “The last thing I wanted to do was cancel our date but I didn’t want to give you my germs.”</p><p>Sebastian shakes his head, a soft sound leaving his lips because this is literally the last thing he expected when he showed up here. He gently makes Blaine back up from the doorframe, letting himself inside and closing the door.</p><p>Blaine coughs into his shoulder, pulling his sleeves down over his hands. “What are you doing?”</p><p>“I have an impeccable immune system. Have you eaten yet?”</p><p>He looks like he’s about to touch Sebastian’s wrist but then thinks better of it, “Sebastian, you don’t have to.”</p><p>The taller smiles gently, fondling with a curl near Blaine’s ear. “I want to. I thought…” He bites down on the inside of his cheek before pressing forward, “I thought you changed your mind or something happened with Kurt so. This is a far better scenario.”</p><p>Blaine frowns a little, his eyebrows crinkling together, “Kurt? No.” He sniffles, “I haven’t spoken to him since last week. He has nothing to do with our date.”</p><p>“Music to my ears,” Sebastian says over his shoulder as he wanders into the kitchen, opening up a few cabinets to search for canned soup. “Can’t believe I’ve been cheated out of a Cary Grant movie.”</p><p>The shorter smiles softly and leans against the counter, watching Sebastian eventually locate soup and pour it into a bowl to microwave. “Well we can’t have that. I’m sure there’s something I can put on for us.”</p><p>“Like you don’t have an entire Cary Grant movie collection, I’m sure.”</p><p>Blaine flushes, which is nice to see given how pale his complexion currently is. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”</p><p>Sebastian hums, unconvinced but smiles back at him, nonetheless. Blaine chews on his lower lip, eyes tracing over the taller’s face, contemplating something before he says it. Sebastian watches him carefully, allows him to take as long as he needs to figure out the words underneath his tongue. He pulls back from the counter as the microwave beeps, retrieving the soup. He grabs a spoon from the drawer near the fridge and motions to the living room, where Blaine follows.</p><p>As they sit on the couch, Blaine clears his throat, settling into one of the corners, “You don’t have to worry about Kurt.”</p><p>“I don’t,” Sebastian says too quickly, running a hand through his hair. He purses his lips and can see Blaine smiling a little out of the corner of his eye.</p><p>“Right, well, in case you <em>do.” </em>Blaine counters, bringing the bowl to his chest to eat. “I don’t want to get back together with him. When I…when I asked you out, I meant it.”</p><p>Sebastian smirks and hands Blaine the remote to put whatever Cary Grant film on that he had in mind, settling into the couch himself and kicking off his shoes. “Let’s get you better first and then we’ll talk about my spiraling self-doubt.”</p><p>“And here I thought Sebastian Smythe didn’t have any room for self-doubt.”</p><p>“I guess that’s true unless it involves you.” He mutters, crossing his arms over his chest as he makes himself comfortable.</p><p>Blaine puts the spoon down in his soup and Sebastian can feel his eyes on him even though he has his own gaze trained on the screen as a movie is selected. Then the couch dips and Blaine plants the softest of kisses to his cheekbone.</p><p>He feels the back of his neck heat with warmth and he’s glad the room’s rather dark so Blaine can’t see it, “Ew germs, what was that for?”</p><p>Blaine chuckles and moves a little closer, crossing his legs so that his knee is pressed against Sebastian’s thigh. “For the soup.”</p><p>“Thank your parents, they bought the can. I just microwaved it.”</p><p>The shorter hums, eyes on the screen as he takes in a few more spoonfuls. “Yes, but I was practically dying on this couch before you showed up so. Much appreciated.”</p><p>Sebastian smirks and shakes his head, trying to figure out what’s going on in this film Blaine’s selected. It’s black-and-white with Katherine Hepburn and…a leopard? Interesting. Such a weird taste in movies but Blaine’s smiling at the screen, letting out a soft laugh every so often—it seems to be worth it.</p><p>Blaine puts down the bowl on the coffee table after a few moments and draws his legs up onto the couch, rubbing the side of his face with the sleeve of his sweater. He yanks on the blanket to drape it over his legs and Sebastian bumps his leg into Blaine’s to get his attention.</p><p>“You cold?”</p><p>The shorter nods softly and Sebastian settles his arm on the back of the couch, motioning him in closer. Blaine hesitates before clearing his throat, “I <em>really </em>don’t want to get you sick.”</p><p>“Will you stop complaining and just get over here?”</p><p>He huffs out a soft noise before he folds, leaning into Sebastian’s chest and an arm settles down on his back. Blaine rests his head on his shoulder, his ice-cold nose brushing the underside of Sebastian’s jaw and making him shiver. He grabs the blanket with his other hand and makes sure to draw it up to Blaine’s throat, his hand creating friction up and down his bicep.</p><p>“As far as first dates go…”</p><p>Blaine groans softly, shaking his head as he sniffles, “Don’t even finish that sentence. I feel like garbage.”</p><p>Sebastian smiles, “Can’t even do anything fun since you can’t breathe through your nose.”</p><p>Blaine pokes his fingers, hard, into Sebastian’s side, “Second date will be better.”</p><p>“You’re gonna ask me out again?”</p><p>“Well, I believe you’re the one that asked to be given a chance. Right?” He looks up at him, a small smile tugging the corners of his mouth.</p><p>Sebastian holds his gaze for a long moment before he nods and then leans forward to press a long kiss against Blaine’s temple.</p><p>So this is what it feels like to begin again.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>thank you so much for reading! i'm over at blainesebastian on tumblr if you want to say hi :3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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